Don’t trust me… I’m not drinking! 

Don’t trust me – I’m not drinking! Lately I’ve been drinking less and less alcohol. It’s not due to wanting to lose weight, it’s not due to an illness, and no I’m not pregnant!!!!!! It’s down to a couple of things. 

No. 1: It doesn’t agree with me, like, it makes me sick. Like actually vomit. I could have 2 glasses of white wine or a few little glasses of prosecco or some vodka & 7up and I am guaranteed to vom at some stage through the night. 
No. 2: I’m 35 and I still get the spinnies. It is the worst feeling in the entire world. I can’t deal. 
No. 3: The following day, I feel so helpless. I feel suicidal. I wake up and instantly feel like I’m worthless, like I’m the worst mother in the world, like there is really no reason for me to exist at all. That no one wants me to actually be here. I spend the entire day like this. It is a complete waste of a day!! 
I guess I’m one of the luckier ones. I am able to enjoy my night without filling it with alcohol. I am able to enjoy the company of others without alcohol. I can dance all night (6000 steps on the fitbit!!) without alcohol. I am able to wake up the next morning and not suffer the fear that I have drunkenly said something I shouldn’t have to someone. In fact, not drinking is just easier. I can drive to and from wherever it is I’m going, which saves on ridiculous taxi fares (and gets me home safe!). More and more lately I’ve gone out and just not drank, but one thing totally baffles me. The attitude towards people who don’t drink. It’s like you’re half a person/you’re not really Irish, if you’re not drinking. It’s slightly annoying to be fair. “Are you pregnant?!” “Are you sick?!” “Why aren’t you drinking” “oooh I don’t trust a non drinker” “ah go on, have 1!” 🙄
No. Just no. I will not become the person who pretends I have a Bacardi & Coke in my hand because I don’t want to listen to the constant badgering of “ah leave your car here, come on, have a drink!!!”. I’m not going to give in and have that 1 drink and run the risk of being breathalysed and most likely be over the limit (let’s be honest, I’m a complete lightweight, 2 sips & im over the limit!). Why is it we have this silly idea that we can’t go out and enjoy ourselves without alcohol in our systems? Ive learned that I don’t need it. 

I can be just as smiley/happy/dancy without the vodka/prosecco/west coast coolers of the world. 
I’m not saying I’ll never drink again, I’m not saying that I won’t have a glass of Prosecco to celebrate… but I am saying that I don’t actually need to, and if it’s means I will wake up the following morning with a fresh head and life not being so difficult, then brilliant!!. I will be the one you can’t entirely trust, because I don’t really drink 😜

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